nocturne with bits of moon

why this trio keeps singing cheesy ballads?

Who am I kidding?

Just me?

Or the whole wide world who’s going to laugh their sorry arses Off?
Knowing he has such a picture perfect profile.
For I just a midget who curl in the corner of this abysmal box.

I kid myself
For over and over again fall for ones that can’t love me back

I kid myself
For pouring all of these unconditional care for man that doesn’t even realize my existence

I kid myself
For these tubby hand won’t ever make him happy,
Though how weary it shall be.

I kid myself
For knowing he won’t lift a pinkie to colour my day.

I kid myself
For realizing this

I kid myself
For continuing to believe that this unbeatable ability to fond

Yet

I cannot boast anything

Can’t
Just can’t

another movie that promotes Paris

"Sometime Linus,more is just more,not better"

Can't agree more to this.
The 1995 version was critizied as a lousy attempt to remake the original Sabrina 1954 with Audrey Hepbrun. Well,i think Julia Ormond (or Harrison Ford?) has dazzeld me to watch this movie for the 4th times. I mean, the idea about choosing to be a chauffeur for the sake of reading more? (Fairchild/Sabrina's dad) is still UNBELIEVEABLY brave,romantic and wise. The look also still relevant to this day (hey it's over a decade ago). One point (on the style part) that i admire most is Sabrina cuts her hair...contrast to the usual style for ugly-duckling-turns-princess was letting a long (most of the times,very) hair down. Instead she looks more independent,sassy,and stylish. In addition,the soundtrack was flawless...off course with STING in it, what can goes wrong?

am no filipino

Trust me,really,i'm not racist. I don't have anything against Filipino either. I've met some cool capoeirista from Filipino,who ensure me that being pregnant is not a hinderance for training. Most people in church also Filipino too (they sure really got a big population of Chatolic there).
Hoever,since i've got here people have been asking me,"Filipino?" and i'd answer,"no,Indonesian".
I'm fine for the the first times,but it's quite tiring for the oomph times.Seems like my look is not remotely "Indonesian" or even "Malay". Numerous times i've been asked as Filipino (no sir/madam I DO NOT understand Tagalog and have whatsoever intention on attending mass in tagalog) or Thai or (this is different a Mac D employee just asked my order in whatever language they're using) Myanmar. Well, at least they're still South East Asian. My friends said it's bad, because being Filipino here is identic as being a maid,and Indonesians as well. Well, i don't really care,since maid is just another profession to me.
I remember on my first year in IKJ, some people thought i was chinese (not the chinese though). I happened again here...I hope i'll get some mandarin soon,it sure can become handy. There's this lady (auntie for exact) at the eating place across my school who spoke to me in Mandarin,but when she knew i'm indonesian..then she speaks Malay.
I was really DELIGHTED. I mean it, when a new friend guessed i'm from indonesia. When i asked why, he told me it's the "r", seems like i "curled" my "r" when i speak in english (oh Mom, i think these Singlish is getting into me).
Truthfully...i miss converse in Indonesian especially in "lo-gue" manner...gimans dong?

september nan ceria

Since september 1998,I've always got goosebumps. Not really a nice kind of goosebumps,but the scary kind,everytime i hear the "September Ceria" song from Vina. Why? Because that song has permeated in my brain ever since i experience mata seni. Or you can say hazing a la IKJ.
My past campus has quite a reputation for this mata seni. It's a tradition,indeed,and still being done as you read. Mind you, i'm not 100% against it,because it gets softer and milder every year. I've heard that they don't use physical contact anymore.
Really,eventhough it's not a sweet memory. I still can't believe that i've survived it. ( Well, it was compulsary for socializing with everyone,especially the seniors back then) First time in my life i got slapped ( on the face that is) by strangers, got stripsearched (again by strangers,luckily they're all women), heared every obnoxious,super-rude swearing words every minutes (most IKJers swears A LOT, apparently), squat walk hourly, ate lunch from my fellows knee length socks ( don't ask), and other bizarre stuff they can even think of. Some of them are hilarious and well-thought though, so i learn to appreciate their efforts.
Turned out it wasn't so bad afterall....that week, and the rest of 4 years there has mold me in to a rather though person. More durable in life.
Nah, nona cyan has taken part in Mata Seni or Penerimaan Siswa baru, but always take the nice senior role. I dunno, i don't have any revenge intention towards my juniors. To me they are simply new friends who needs extra guidance. In addition,arranging those kind of things is very-very TIRING!! I can't believe those siepam ("the bad guy role") still got energy to scold,mock,yell or drag 7 days in a row.
Last week, when i went to NUS (National University of Singapore) I saw a line up. Oh my goodness....there's still hazing!
What the seniors made them do? chew gum under a cop's nose? I've found it amusing...because Singapore is such a controlled clean environment,unlike IKJ,which was chaotic and shabby.